Shattered Dreams
by Boston Knight
Summary: Serena's world shattered the night Darian left her. As she began picking up the pieces, she was haunted by troubling dreams. Were they memories of her life before? Or perhaps a forewarning to an enemy she'd never knew existed? Will the comfort she finds in a friend spell further disaster for her heart or are things as simple as they seem?
1. Chapter 1

**AN:So here are a few things everyone should know before reading this. This idea came to me about twenty years ago when I first watched Sailor Moon as a very young girl who had never even heard the term fanfiction. I, literally, watched the episode where Darian breaks up with Serena and the very next day the tv station I was watching it on replaced it. I, therefore, had to come up with my own ending because the show could not end like that. I have never written a fanfiction centered in Japanese culture so if I cause offense, please tell me and I will fix it. I do not own the characters but this story is my own. Rini/ChibiUsa or whatever does not exist in this universe I've created. Also this story gets angsty. I tear apart friendships and relationships; but I also love me happy-ish endings. I'd love feedback and as I have no one betaing this for me lemme know if I've misspelled, misgrammared, miss-whatevered. Please enjoy!**

Prologue (A peak 3 years into the future)

She gripped the door handle for a moment mustering the courage to open it. She'd been away from Tokyo for three years. The thought of re-entering the halls of her old school was almost more terrifying than any monster she'd ever had to face. The autumn wind was blowing her shoulder length blonde hair and the green ribbon she was using as a headband. Shutting her eyes, she chanted a soothing mantra to herself working to slow her breathing.

Further reassurance came as she felt his hand on her shoulder. It spread a calmness to her fears, reminding her she wasn't alone. Though he would be attending the University down the street, just knowing he would be close helped ease the nerves that had threatened to undo her moments before.

Upon entry she made her way to the school's office to file the last remaining paperwork. The secretary handed over her new schedule and after a brief thank you she made her way to her class. She was thankful for the empty hallways. Her heels echoing down the corridors accompanied only by the sound the swish of her school uniform's skirt was keeping further butterflies from rising up from her stomach.

"You will call if you need anything," he finally said when the room came into view.

"I will be fine," she said quietly playing with her glasses and not looking up.

"If it gets to be too much, we can go back to tutoring and…"

"No," she said firmly, her blue eyes meeting his. "I have to do this. You _know_ I have to do this."

He was quiet for a while, seemingly looking for a solid argument, but finally sighed and whispered, "Be careful. This isn't the same school you left and the people…"

"You mean my friends?" she interrupted quickly.

He grimaced, a million silent apologies pleading in his eyes

"I know," she whispered sighing and shaking haunting memories from her head.

Resolute, she stepped forward, throwing him a smile over her shoulder, "I don't have any friends here."

With that she entered her new homeroom.

Chapter 1 (Back to the present)

Three months had passed since Darian had abruptly broken up with her. Despite the constant ache nagging in the back of her heart, Serena was doing fairly well. She was putting more time into her homework, spending more energy practicing her sailor skills, and avoiding any conversation that had anything to do with how she was 'feeling.' She knew if she broke that one barrier, even for a moment, she would be back where she was that heart wrenching day, lying in a heap on the floor of that phone booth.

Her friends all wanted to help, but lately they had learned to avoid asking any unnecessary questions knowing Serena would deflect or disregard them completely. Seeing it was straining their friendships Serena tried to make up for her emotional distance by putting the focus on her friends and their well being. She also was keeping her interactions limited to group outings and sailor training. She made sure she was never alone with one of the girls for fear all the strength she'd built up would crumble under their scrutiny.

Today the five of them were heading to a cafe not far from the arcade. Ami was busy talking about cram school to Rei and Mina kept commenting to Lita on the shops as they passed. Serena let the sound wash over her and walked without saying a word. She merely smiled and nodded when it seemed appropriate.

Currently she was lost in the memory of a dream she'd have the night before.

 _She never saw his face, but his familiarity pushed just beyond the boundaries of her recognition._

 _"We have to run Serena," he whispered in her ear. They were in the shadows, he held her from behind against the pillar as to avoid the guards patrolling the walls. "Darian and the others will be here soon and they cannot find us."_

 _"But..." she said biting her lip. She didn't know what to do. Everything about this felt wrong, but she could see no other course of action._

 _"You know what will happen if they do…." In his grasp she could feel the sincerity of his words. She knew the unspoken consequences and she trusted him entirely. "I fear most of all that I won't be able to see you again. It's forbidden."_

 _Closing her eyes, the tears on the surface threatening to pour, she smiled sadly, "I know."_

 _Turning her to face him and lifting her chin and meeting her eyes, he avowed, "I have to protect you."_

"Serena?" Lita said pulling on her sleeve.

"Oh yeah…" she said, the mist of the dream receding and realizing she'd stopped halfway down the block behind the other girls.

"You are such a space cadet…" Rei called to her rolling her eyes.

"Sorry," she mumbled embarrassed.

"Everything alright?" Lita asked tentatively

"Of course," she replied smiling brightly.

Lita started walking ahead and Serena cursed herself for getting distracted.

Hearing her name again, this time behind her, she turned around. She'd inadvertently stopped right in front of her favorite arcade.

"Serena! It's been forever since I've seen you!" Andrew exclaimed running up to her and giving her a big hug.

"Oh," she responded not sure what to say. She'd been avoiding the place since...well since Darian… Mustering up a brave face she smiled and said, "Sorry I've been so busy."

"I've missed that smile of yours," he said patting her head playfully.

She laughed and was about to respond when his companion walked up. She felt his presence even before she looked up. An intoxicating scent of red roses and cedar overwhelmed her. His midnight blue eyes were unmistakable and still after all this time she had to control her breathing as her heart sped up.

"Hello Serena," he said barely looking upon here.

"Darian," she half choked out before turning back to Andrew, "I have to go, but I will try to stop by sometime soon, okay?"

With that she ran up to the other scouts, all with varying degrees of concern marked on their faces. This, as far as any of them knew, was the first time she'd seen Darian since the breakup and they weren't wrong.

Before anyone could say anything, she said, "I just remembered this big test tomorrow. I still have a ton of studying to do. Raincheck on dinner?"

She didn't wait for an answer just hurried across the street and once out of eyesight ran til she was out of breath. She almost had made it home, but she wasn't ready to be there either. Luna had stopped asking if she was alright but had a nasty habit of lingering around Serena if she felt something was amiss. She knew she had to get her emotions under control first.

She felt the buzzing of her cell phone in her pocket but turned it off without looking at the messenger. Everyone wants to help but how could anyone understand. He was supposed to have been the love of her life...technically the love of her multiple lives. And he was gone.

/

 _"I have to protect you!" he whispered kissing his princess on the forehead._

 _The scene dematerialized and he was left alone in darkness and shadows._

 _"Do you honestly think you can hide her from me forever?" the dark voice echoed in the black._

 _"I would give my life before I let you anywhere near Lady Serenity." he said reaching for his sword._

 _"And I will take it. Your life….their lives...whatever it takes."_

"No!" he cried to the empty apartment.

Damn! he thought. The same dream again. Andrew couldn't shake it. Why did he keep having that same dream? Why was it always this Lady Serenity? Her likeness to Serena was really affecting him.

The pull to her was getting worse. Today when he ran into her he was so reluctant to let her go after their hug. It didn't make any sense. He'd known her for years and never felt anything but friendship toward her. Now it was everything to him to see her safe. He'd tried to ask nonchalantly to her friends how she was, but he'd had to stop when Ami started questioning his increasing interest in her blonde best friend.

He'd chastised himself for his increasing obsession with Serena. He knew how Darian felt about her. Even though he'd broken up with her, something inside told Andrew that Darian was far from over her. She was beyond off limits to him. He had to do what he could to be a good guy and repay the loyalties of his dearest friend.

So, why with all of that, was he having to fight so hard against throwing everything away to be near her just one more time?

/

Darian stared across the Tokyo skyline, a glass of red wine in his hand. Neon lights lit the darkness below like fireflies.

Serena loved this view, he thought sadly.

What he wouldn't do to share it with her again…

 _Once more he felt her collapse in his arms, lifeless and cold._

Frustrated he stared at his bed. Curse his dreams. Curse his heart.


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: The prologue was purposely nameless of characters because I wanted to hint at where this story was going without giving away too much. Also I should state that the Serena and Darian love story was one of the first I'd ever fallen in love with growing up. That being said, you will have to see how things work out. I'm so thankful for the feedback I've already gotten. It really helps fuel my creative fire. Thanks again for reading! (I don't own the characters, just a fan)**

" _Lady Serenity," he whispered entering the empty hall._

" _Is this the man?" she asked the snow white cat to her left._

" _Yes milady, his name is Aisling," Artemis replied._

 _She appraised the man before her. He was taller than her by a head and the broad reaches of his shoulders reminded her of Endymion. Though in contrast to her betrothed's dark striking features, his face was much softer. His blond hair swept just above the light of his soft blue eyes and they warmed as he looked upon her._

 _He swept into a bow before her. Without looking up he stated, "I apologize for the urgency and need for discretion, but I fear milady is in grave danger."_

 _She looked momentarily confused and turned to Artemis, "If it is a matter of safety, should not Mina be here as well?"_

" _No milady," Aisling continued. "We've no way to know who we can trust. Any member of your guard could already be compromised."_

" _Nonsense, I trust each of them with my life." She said dismissively._

" _It is not only your life I fear to be in danger. Anyone close to you is already in jeopardy," Artemis intervened._

" _What does that even mean?" she asked._

" _If they cannot be controlled, they will be consumed." Aisling and Artemis recited together._

 _Feeling this all rather silly, Serenity waved them both off. "Whatever this is we will face it as we always have, together."_

" _Then you will die together, milady," Artemis stated._

" _How can you be so sure?" she demanded._

" _Because I've seen it. I know what he is capable of." Aisling answered._

" _And why should I trust you?"_

" _Because even in this moment I am risking everything to be here."_

" _Artemis why have you brought this to me?"_

" _He speaks the truth Lady Serenity. This evil almost bearing down upon us is one even your mother could not beat. She banished him to the edge of the universe hoping he could never return. He took from her what he needed long ago and his power was a mere sliver of his capabilities now. If he is to return we all will perish. There is only one hope, milady, and this man is it."_

" _How?" she asked chilled by Artemis's words. "Why?"_

" _This man can walk in other realities, destroy countless lives in their sleep," Aisling began._

" _Dreamwalking, we call it," Artemis interjected._

" _When the Queen banished him, she also inadvertently locked him in the dream world. He can no longer shift the planes of reality, but he remains dangerous. He has ruined civilization after civilization amassing power and clawing his way back. His singulair goal is to return and use the blood of the celestial line to reemerge back into this world. Your blood milady."_

" _And how can you possibly help us?"_

" _Because like my father, I too, can walk in the world of dreams."_

 _Serenity stepped back but he grabbed her wrist._

" _I promise you I mean you no harm. I don't have more time to explain but know even now I am protecting you. You life means more to me than my own."_

 _He laid a single amethyst pendant in her palm, "Proof of my allegiance my princess. I will see you again. Sleep well Princess."_

 _Serenity awoke in bed covered in sweat. How alarming? She thought bringing her knees up and hugging her legs._

 _She froze when she felt the cold metal chain brush against her shin. The amethyst pendant was still in her hand._

Serena woke the next morning, late and groggy, cursing the annoyingly cheerful alarm clock. She'd stayed up far too late exhausting herself with schoolwork and exercise and whatever sleep she'd had forwent to that dream. Teetering clumsily she zombie walked through her shower, getting dressed, and barely remembered to grab a single piece of toast before she needed to be out the door.

When she got to school she saw that her phone was full of texts from the girls. None of them directly asked her about Darian, but they all held the underlying curiosity and concern she'd come to expect. After sending a mass text that she was good and looked forward to seeing everyone at practice tomorrow night, she noticed she had another text.

"Hey Serena, just curious if you had plans for dinner. I have a friend who just opened up a noodle place downtown and wondered if you'd want to check it out with me. -Andrew"

Serena bit her lip. Having dinner with just Andrew went against her plan to always be in a group but she couldn't insist on making it a group thing for fear he might invite Darian. She also really couldn't keep avoiding him. Andrew was her friend after all. She'd barely talked to him in months. It's not his fault she no longer could be around Darian.

She sent him a quick 'sure' response and he told her he'd be by that night around 7 and they could walk together.

Despite her exhaustion she looked forward to the evening. Something about Andrew always made her feel more at ease. His exuberant personality was contagious.

That night he'd arrived just past seven. He apologized for the tardiness but she quickly reminded him to look who he was talking too. He laughed and moment of awkward silence passed between them before he suddenly bent over in front of her.

"Milady," he said exaggerating his bow and extending his arm out.

Laughing she took his silly gesture, letting any awkwardness evaporate between them, and they started strolling further into town.

He looked down at her and smiled. "I've really missed you Serena."

She laughed and joked, "It's just because I'm so loud. You can't help but miss me."

He laughed and shook his head. "It's more than that...though I will admit things have certainly calmed down around the arcade. Not so many blondes yelling at my machines."

Serena blushed but laughed. "Not my fault your machines cheat."

"Surely it has nothing to do with you and your own gaming abilities," he teased.

"Absolutely not!" she said indignantly, giving him her serious face.

"Well then it must be the game," he replied matching her tone and mannerisms.

They both then burst into giggles and she swatted at his arm playfully for making fun of her.

"Seriously though, it's really good to see you smile." The way he looked at her she could tell that there were a thousand hidden messages under that simple sentence.

"How are classes going this year?" she asked swiftly changing the subject.

Andrew smiled and took the hint. "Classes are good. My lunches stink but without Rita I suppose that can't be helped."

As though she was compelled she whispered, "Has it been hard without Rita around?"

"I'd be lying if I said I had taken it wonderfully. In fact, I was such a mess the first week I didn't leave the apartment. It hadn't been til…"Suddenly he just trailed off.

"What?" she asked worried.

He sighed, "It wasn't until Darian literally drug me out of my apartment, after having unceremoniously thrown me into the shower, fully clothed mind you, that I even tried to function in any sense of normality."

"I see," she whispered, now fully understanding his hesitation.

"I imagine you understand how that feels."

She nodded slightly but otherwise said nothing.

"You should have seen my first attempt at dinner. Let's just say I am lucky the fire department hadn't been called." He said laughing, seamlessly switching the subject.

Serena smiled brightly, thankful to her friend."Are you still as hopelessly inept at cooking as I remember?"

"We all have our skills," he replied shrugging. "Mine simply aren't culinary."

"Have you even tried learning to cook? Or is it all instant ramen in your cupboards?"

Andrew smiled sheepishly and she knew the answer.

"That's it. This weekend we are shopping and I am teaching you some basic cooking skills."

"Since when did you learn how to cook?"

"Lita showed me. I'm nothing compared to her culinary genius but I can show you the basics."

"I'd like that."


	3. Chapter 3

**AN: This chapter was super fun to write...til the end. My muse is why I can't have nice things haha. I do not own the characters but the story is all me. Thanks again for all the feedback so far. I love writing this. Thanks for reading.**

Carrying the groceries out of the shop, Andrew was teasing her about her choices for dinner.

She kept jumping at him trying to grab the bag so that she didn't have to hear how he has to do _all_ the cooking and do _all_ the heavy lifting.

"We are cooking _together_ and if you had not gone all alpha male in there I would be carrying the bag," Serena grumbled folding her arms.

"Oh here, sorry princess." He mocked lofting the heavy bag into her arms.

Immediately regretting the situation she stopped and looked at him with a pout.

"Not so tough now are you," he laughed pulling the bag back in his arms.

She stuck out her tongue, "Fine you are the all powerful paper bag carrier. You should be proud."

"I am also about to devastatingly destroy this chicken in here," he said looking into the bag.

"Not if I can help it." she laughed.

"I shall be the all powerful vegetable destructor!" He proclaimed with a maniacal laugh.

"I will be surprised if the great destructor doesn't cut himself preparing said vegetables."

"All the vegetables will bow down to my magnificence when I wield my powerful weapon."

"By powerful weapon do you mean the vegetable peeler or wooden spoon you will be using tonight?" Serena was slowing losing her sarcastic composure as fits of giggles started seeping through.

Andrew stopped as though contemplating her ridiculous question seriously. "You dare mock the kitchen wizard?!" he said with mock indignation.

"Only when the kitchen wizard can't even boil water on the stove."

"Fair point." By this point both were laughing and Serena wasn't watching her footing. Her heel caught a rock and as she still happened to the single klutziest person on the planet she fell to the pavement.

"Serena! Are you okay?" Andrew said reaching down to help her up.

Instead of crying as he expected, she started laughing harder. "What is the point of being all powerful if you can't even save a damsel from falling down."

"My powers are newly acquired. And in my defense, they seem limited to the kitchen and carrying groceries."

"Some superhero you are," she stated letting him help her up.

"Use my arm til we get back to my place. That skinned knee looks painful."

"Sure, sure."

They walked quietly for awhile. Andrew couldn't help but notice how nice it felt to have Serena so close.

"Hey Andrew," Serena whispered after a little while.

"Hmmm?" he inquired.

"Thank you," she said. "It's been a long time since I laughed like this."

He smiled down to her, he gave her a kiss on her hair. "You're welcome."

Serena tensed for a moment, but didn't say anything to the gesture. It didn't feel like he was trying to push anything. It just felt reassuring.

"This is not a wholly selfless act you know?"

"Oh yeah?" she inquired not looking up at him.

"I am really tired of instant ramen."

Her head jerked up and she started to laugh at his 'serious' affirmation.

When they reached the stairway to his apartment, she froze and stiffled her giggle. Suddenly the wind was knocked out of her and it felt as though her night completely changed.

Sensing her discomfort, Andrew stopped beside her and looked up.

"Darian," Andrew said.

"I brought dinner, thinking we could hang out. Looks like you had other plans," Darian stated. His voice was cold and he never once looked at Serena.

Not wanting to cause him any trouble, Serena quickly said, "Andrew, I'm gonna go. We will cook this later this week."

She turned but Darian grabbed her arm. "Here Andrew." He said handing him the bag he brought. "I will see Serena home."

"Serena…" Andrew started.

"It's fine Andrew. I will text you."

It was several blocks of silent brooding before Serena had enough.

"Darian let me go!" she said wrenching her arm free. His gripped had been gentle, but her skin practically burned where he'd touched her. His touch shouldn't still affect her this fiercely.

Though it was just past dusk, the park was well lit enough by street lamps that he could see the anger in her eyes.

Unable to shake the image of what he just saw, he irrationally asked, "What were you doing?"

"I don't think that's any of your business anymore," she whispered stubbornly.

"Not my business?! He's my best friend….you're my...you're my…"

"Ex." she barely said but by the way he flinched she knew he heard her.

"That's not… I'm not… God Serena do you think I want this?!"

She stepped back not sure what to think. "You broke up with me Darian. If you didn't want this, then what else could you have possibly wanted?"

He laughed darkly, turning from her and running his hands frustratedly through his raven locks. A few seconds of silence drug out into the night air, he seemed to be trying to decide what to say.

"I assumed you'd move on, I just thought you'd have more tact than to go after my best friend."

Serena froze, he may as well have just slapped her.

"How dare you?" she whispered, hot angry tears forming in her eyes.

"How dare I?! You looked awful cozy together. I have to wonder how long it took you to wrap yourself around him like that. You always did have a thing for him."

"If you honestly think this little of me, then clearly you leaving me was the right thing for you to do."

"Serena…" he said hearing the hurt in her voice.

"No you don't get the right to act like this. You don't get to be jealous. You left me." She turned and ran the rest of the way home, alone. He would not get to see her cry...not this time.


	4. Chapter 4

**AN:Thanks everyone for reading and reviewing! I am having a lot of fun writing this piece. I do not own Sailor Moon or its characters, just this story. Happy reading!**

About an hour after she returned home Serena was startled by a knock at her bedroom window.

"Andrew!" she whispered surprised. It was late enough in the evening that entire house was dark and up until that moment Serena had been in bed.

He was sitting on the ledge of her second floor balcony. "I apologize if I woke you. I just needed to make sure you were okay."

Ignoring the questioning look she was getting from Luna, Serena pulled on her robe, stepped out the window, and joined him outside.

"I'm home safe, if that's what you are asking." Sitting beside him, she knew that wasn't what he was asking.

Rubbing the back of his neck with his hand he whispered, "I really hadn't meant to cause you any trouble."

"It was his mistake for misunderstanding," she responded.

Staring out into the dark night she whispered, "I don't know why I even care."

"Because you still love him," he responded knowingly.

She smiled at him sadly, wiping away a tear threatening to fall. Looking up into the stars she ask, "Do you believe in destiny?"

"Depends on the day," he replied. "You?"

"I had," she started, then sighed. "With Darian I thought I'd had found my destiny. I know we are both young and I could truly chalk it up to schoolgirl romanticism. But things had happened. Things that made me believe that what we have...what we _had_ was bigger than us both."

"I don't know if I thought it was destiny," Andrew replied, "but with Rita I thought I'd found love. I thought I would never find anything like it again and wanted to hold onto it forever. When she left, it was like she took that part of me with her."

"Have you gotten that piece back?" she whispered wondering if the hole inside of her could ever heal.

He smiled at her and pulled her into a hug. "I never lost that piece of me. Though in my heart there will always be a part of me that belongs to her, my heart still belongs to me."

He never just got a piece of my heart though. Serena thought. Darian had every bit of it. Does that mean it will always belong to him? Was she doomed to her misery forever?

Burying her face in his chest, hiding from the world Serena admitted, "I feel as though every dream I had was cruelly ripped from me and now I have to live in the aftermath of this nightmare. Everyday I wake up and I have to remind myself that I am alone. My first impulse is to call him in the morning and my last thought is to wish him goodnight in the evening. I keep walking through my days functioning as best I can but it's like my purpose is gone and I'm just flailing around lost."

Andrew just held her listening.

"Sorry," she mumbled pulling herself back and wiping her cheeks. "I hadn't said any of that out loud yet so its hitting me harder right now. Don't misunderstand me. I'm not waiting for him to put me back together and I don't want to be rescued."

"I would have never thought that," Andrew said lifting her chin up. "I know your friends sometimes call you a cry baby but from what I've witnessed you have a strength below the surface that's quite formidable and I would never bet against you."

"Thanks," she replied blushing slightly.

"I am going to talk to Darian," he said quietly.

"No, Andrew…"

"I am going to talk to him for myself. I can only imagine what he must of thought when we came walking up to the apartment."

"Oh he has plenty of ideas about what he saw," she mumbled bitterly.

"I was afraid of that. I don't know the specifics about what happened between the two of you, but I don't think this has been particularly easy on him either."

"Good," she said turning away from him. She didn't mean it. A part of her ached to think of Darian in any pain. Though she remember how cold he was that day last spring and it was hard to believe he felt anything on the matter, let alone pain.

He was going to reply but he watched as the different emotions fell upon her face. He didn't want to press and cause her more pain.

"I should go, I open the arcade in the morning. Will you be alright?"

"I'm strong remember? I will be just fine."

He gave her another quick hug before descending over the ledge and climbed back down the side of the house.

Serena walked back to her bed before sinking to her knees beside it, emotionally drained.

"Serena?!" Luna asked concerned.

"I'll be okay Luna. I'm strong. I will be just fine," she stated robotically.

Climbing under sheets she turned from the cat. She cried silent tears for hours before she finally fell asleep.

 _"Princess?"_

 _The word snaked around me in the vast nothingness of the dream. The voice was distance, searching, determined._

 _She stood frozen, lost, unsure of what to do or where to go. The only thing she was certain of was the fear. With one word, whoever this was, they'd filled her with terror._

"Ow!" Serena exclaimed bolting upright in bed. Looking down, her hand was red.

"Luna….did you bite me?!"

"I had no choice. You were thrashing in your sleep, calling out intelligibly, and I couldn't wake you any other way."

"Oh...It hurts," she pouted.

"Are you okay?" Luna asked. "Andrew..."

"I'm fine," she interjected quickly and automatically.

"You're not alone Serena. I wish you'd remember that."

"In this, I am. I really am."

 **AN:Thanks for reading! Lemme know what you think!**


	5. Chapter 5

**AN:Thanks everyone for reading and reviewing. Writing this is such a fun journey for me! Keep letting me know what you think and I will keep trying to update as soon as I can! I don't own Sailor Moon or its characters, just this story.**

"Are you stalking me now Luna?" Serena asked noticing the cat following her to school.

"There was a time when I walked you to school almost daily Serena."

"And now?"

"I am...concerned," she replied simply.

"I'm fine," she said exasperated. Luna had annoyingly watched her getting ready this morning, but she had been silent. Why she choose now to say anything really irritated her.

"Yes, and strong. You keep saying that. Yet you barely sleep anymore. You are so careful who you are around and avoid certain places entirely. This route, for instance, takes you at least ten more minutes as you bypass a good chunk of downtown."

"I am adding to my exercise," Serena lied, "you should be proud I would take such initiative."

"Fine. Then let's talk about the boy who came by your room last night."

"Luna! Quiet! You make it sound indecent. He never came in my room and was just making sure I was okay after..." she trailed off.

"After?" the cat pried.

"Nothing," Serena snapped. That was the last thing she wanted to discuss with her.

Luna jumped in front of Serena stopping her in her tracks.

"This is my concern. These non answers of yours. You have stopped talking to me. You have stopped talking with all the scouts. We are worried about you."

Angry, Serena clenched her fists, "What do you want me to say? Whether I talk about this or not, no words are going to fix this. Do you want me to say I'm not okay? That its a chore even to get out of bed? What is that going to help?"

"Its better then lying to yourself."

"Who's lying to herself? I know what a mess I am inside. I was only lying to you!"

Luna watched her disappear from view, still completely in shock of her barbed words.

…..

A cool breeze rustled through the ample forestation around Rei's family temple. Darian had wandered here after his lectures hoping to gain insight and regain focus. He'd been ignoring texts all day from Andrew not sure what he'd say to his friend and even more fearful of what Andrew could have to say to him. Serena was beautiful, bright when she tried, and a singular rose in an otherwise desolate garden. He was not surprised in the least that someone else could see her the way he did, but that didn't calm to rage in his heart. For so long she'd been his rose. His alone.

Burning incense at the top of the hill, he prayed for clarity. All he wanted was to keep her safe. Though if he truly was honest with himself, he also wanted to keep her isolated.

 _A bird in a cage is safe and isolated, but will never fly free or know its own true potential._ He thought bitterly. These are selfish dreams of a selfish heart. How much longer could he deny it?

Slowly descending the stairs he heard the cracks of wood and grunts of training. Standing in the doorway behind her, he watched her silently for quite some time. Serena glistened with sweat from an already intense workout. Her hair was pulled back and braided to keep out of her face, but strands were adorably escaping clinging to her face and neck. Closing her eyes, she seemed to channel her unbridled rage into her steps. He recognized she was practicing a form of aikido and was fairly certain the practice dummy was looking worse for its wear for her efforts. It was as though she wanted to release every feeling into the immobile thing. He watched her increasingly tired resilience unable to be anything but impressed. Her endurance and drive was something he'd only seen when she was Sailor Moon.

Beyond that his heart tore at the pained look on her face. The gentle light he cherished in her was gone. How was any of this worth it if she already seemed dead inside?

She'd heal, he admonished. She'd heal and grow and live a long life. Full of happiness, full of love, just without him. He knew his strength was faltering.

"I only want you safe," he whispered to himself turning to leave. He could not stay any longer.

"I wasn't safe with you?" she asked without interrupting her training. Clearly the extra practices were improving all of her skills, not just her stamina.

"I don't know," he said finally. Halting, mesmerized by her stride. Why was it so cute the way she moved?

Stopping, but not turning she asked quietly, "Is this you finally giving me a reason why you left?"

"Would it matter if it was?" Darian asked trying to bury the hope in his words.

"I'm not sure," she replied honestly. "I would have given anything to know the reason that night...and countless nights after. Now...now it seems insufficient against the act itself. Whatever the reason, the end result was the same."

"I was having dreams," Darrian blurted before he could stop himself.

When she didn't reply, he couldn't help but continue. He was so tired of hurting her. "Horrible dreams. I thought the only way to save you was to stay away from you. I was trying to protect you. The idea of losing you, of you dying. It was too much and I did the only thing I thought I could."

"You," she said her voice breaking, "none of this makes sense. Why didn't you talk to me? Why was this...all of this the best answer?"

"I don't know," he replied stupidly. "Your life meant...means more to me then my own happiness. That has always been true."

"I don't understand," she said fighting the tears. She'd be strong. She had to be.

"I love you Serena and I won't, I can't, pretend like I don't anymore."

She reached an arm out bracing herself against the dummy.

"Serena forgive me." He reached up behind her and put his arms around her.

"Stop," she whispered, closing her eyes, her voice breaking. "Please stop."

She pulled away from him. Her knees gave way and she crumpled to the ground.

"Do you love him?" He asked, his face unreadable. Remembering cruelly that he could already be too late.

She snorted exasperatedly at his audacity.

"If you love him, I will stay away."

"I've only ever been able to love you." She whispered defeated. Tears began falling and she covered her face.

He knelt down in front of her and pulled her into his arms where she wept til she had nothing left.


	6. Chapter 6

**AN:Hey guys! Sorry its been a bit of time. Wound up having surgery and dealing with all of that I haven't had a chance to do much writing. Hopefully I can update the next chapter a bit sooner then this one. Hope you enjoy! Please let me know what you think.**

Sitting on the ledge of her balcony, Serena let the cool air wash over her. Closing her eyes she listened to the leaves and focused to calm her worried mind. She'd finally had the answers her heart had longed for, and moreover, she had Darian, his heart, his love, if she so desired to take it.

Was it merely fear that compelled her hesitation?

How had so much changed in such a short period of time?

She'd barely had a chance to begin healing. Could she really erase the hurt as though she'd never had those scars to begin with?

Thankfully he hadn't pushed her any further after she fell apart in his arms. Perhaps it was because of how well he knew her. He had kindly saw her home and didn't push the matter further. Had he continued she surely would have given him anything he'd asked but a part of herself would still have been sitting here fighting off the nagging inclinations of regret.

Luna jumped up on the ledge beside her and silently curled up beside her.

"Things got really screwed up," Serena whispered. Whether it was to the night or to the cat it was unclear, but Luna remained silent. Unlike this morning, she didn't press or pry.

"And I guess," she continued, "now they don't have to be..." It came out as more of a question then statement.

"Except...I don't know how to just go back to before. Or maybe that's not what he's asking. Maybe it's about going forward. But doesn't that mean going back? I know I'm supposed to be with Darian. I know I want to be with Darian. But...I'm so confused."

"He hurt you. Whatever else has happened, I think confusion is normal."

Serena blinked and looked down at the cat. She'd expected a lot from Luna, mostly negative, though that was her expectation of most everyone lately. Had her reality truly become so skewed? As odd as it was, she never expected this...this amount of understanding.

Finally she whispered quietly, "I'm sorry...for this morning."

Luna looked up at her thoughtfully, "So many millennia have passed that I forget sometimes you are still just a teenager. You are entirely ruled by your emotions and that can be both a blessing and a curse."

"How do I decide what is right if I do not even know exactly what I am feeling though?"

Luna leaned against her leg and smiled. "You do the best you can. And know that whatever decision you make, you have people in your life who care about you no matter what."

...

The next day the arcade was buzzing with life during the after school rush. Andrew hadn't had a chance to breathe let alone think since his shift had begun. Couple that with his sudden inability to get a decent nights sleep and the his usual upbeat demeanor seemed to be sullied a bit. Distracted he didn't even seen the tall silhouette that now shadowed the corner bar.

"I've spoken to Serena. I still have feelings for her and further intend to reconcile our relationship."

Surprised Andrew sucked in his breath and dropped the rag in his hand. He'd been trying to contact Darian for two days and hadn't expected him to simply show up at the arcade. Smiling he turned to face his friend, "It's about time! You've been miserable for months."

"I did not want there to be any misunderstandings between us," Darian said scrutinizing his friends reactions.

Turning back to continue wiping down the counter, Andrew laughed, "you do not need to sound so threatening. I am her friend as I am yours."

"The other night…"

"The other night," he interrupted, "your insane jealousy misinterpreted the situation."

Darian sheepishly rubbed his neck looking relieved. "So you do not have feelings for Serena."

...

" _She isn't yours to protect or have you forgotten my son?" The venomous words brushed past him in the darkness, a warning. As though a small hand waiting to strangle him with their toxic undertones._

" _She belongs to the moon and the earth and the realities of another world. What can you possibly give her that she does not already have? Love?" A wicked laugh echoed its mockery abound him._

" _I can desire to protect her even from the shadows without the impediment of love."_

" _Can you? Can you really?"_

It was the middle of the night and yet another dream roused him from sleep. Walking into the kitchen, Darian's words echoed in Andrew's head once again. _So you do not have feelings for Serena._

Running a hand through his messy blond hair he tried to shake the uneasy feeling in his gut. He grabbed a glass and watched absently as the faucet poured.

She could be happy now, he reminded himself.

Would she be? The part of his brain he was trying desperately to ignore added.

Remembering their talk on the balcony he felt the doubt eating away at his brain. Her pain was so raw. Andrew had felt so powerless against it. Even now he could feel how fragile she'd felt against him.

There was no denying the sincerity of Darian's words but Andrew couldn't help but want to protect her. He'd left her before. What would stop him from doing it again?


	7. Chapter 7

**AN: I apologize for the length between postings but such is life sometimes. I also apologize if I make anyone unhappy with the characterizations towards the end of this chapter. Since I first decided to write this story character growth was a primary source of inspiration; that being said, I am setting a rather blunt benchmark with this chapter. I still have a LONG way to go with this story but I am not one to leave a story unfinished. Thanks for sticking with me, enjoy reading, and let me know what you think. Sadly still do not own these characters.**

Serena stumbled back against the tree trying to regain her breath. She had to be about fifteen feet off the ground and a recent rain was making it difficult to maintain a decent footing. These after-dusk training exercises Mina had devised were likely to kill her faster than any creature could. In essence all they were doing was an advanced form of hide and seek but given each girl's talents likening it to a simple child's game was highly inaccurate. 'Perhaps adding an element of dodge ball,' she mused sarcastically. '...if the ball was made of fire or lightning, would be more accurate.'

"You have quite a knack for hiding these days," she heard him say behind her. Lost in her own thoughts she hadn't seen him close in. His breathy words felt like velvet against her neck causing a shiver ran to down her spine

Suddenly she was thankful for the dark as her cheeks burned crimson. "Darian…"

A week had passed since their encounter at the temple and while she knew it was childish she found herself avoiding him ever since. She was very confused and she felt seeing him would make that confusion all the worse. It was difficult to feel hurt when he looked at her the way he did. Even now, with only the moon to light his features, the feelings he stirred with his smile were not that of pain and she could feel herself wanting to fall all over again.

Wrapping his arm around her waist she felt him brace them both against the trees interior. "Your training is improving quite nicely." This time she felt his breath on her ear as his lips barely brushed against it.

"Why are you here?" she asked trying to think of anything that wasn't the feel of his body pressed up against her.

"I could say that Mina finally wore me down and I came out of obligation," she could hear the amusement in his words. "But, alas, I came to see you."

The fingertips of his free hand touched her cheek and traced their way from her jawline down her neck. Her breath hitched at the gesture and she leaned into the caress.

"I miss you," he whispered gently placing a small kiss on the other side of her neck just below her ear.

She couldn't say anything. The small kiss itself made her dizzy and she found herself turning toward him.

His lips caught hers lightly at first, a question moreso then anything. She met his lips with her own, a surprising hunger exploding in her chest. It was as though she had been thirsty for days and he was the sweetest fountain she'd ever tasted.

A small moan escaped her lips as he pressed her against the tree meeting her hunger with his own. He traced kisses down her neck as she gave way to the sensation entirely.

He laughed, breathy and low. "I think you just gave way our position."

She, too, sensed the incoming danger and the two of them leapt apart. While the tree erupted in flame, she couldn't help but note the real fire that roared in her belly or the pleasurable stinging that played on her lips.

/

At the temples base the scouts began to gather after their training. Serena was attending minor scrapes and assessing bruises while Mina and Ami went over logistics and tactics. She smiled appreciatively, listening to them analyzing every move. Her style was much different and while her dodge and duck instinctual method was effective, it wouldn't really lend itself to the conversation.

"Serena?!" Lita called, dashing out of a set of trees to her left.

"What?" She replied caught of guard by the eagerness of her statuesque hovering friend.

"Did I see what I think I saw?" She whispered kneeling beside her and wiggling her eyebrows conspiratorially.

"What?" She asked again this time confused.

"Oh, come on," she said prodding her playfully with her elbow. "Serena and Darian sitting in a tree. K-I-"

Too late, Serena put her hand over Lita's mouth, her cheeks burning with embarrassment.

"Did you two get back together?" Mina asked, her level of enthusiasm matching Lita's.

"I…"

"It's good he finally forgave you for whatever you did," Rei interjected while removing her training gloves. She had just emerged from the same area that Lita had entered.

Serena just blinked, lost like a deer in headlights.

"Rei!" Ami chastised.

"What?! I'm just saying that it's good he can be mature and forgiving. She needs that. She's clumsy and screws up easy."

"Rei you're just angry because you saw them too." Lita said dismissively. "I was happy to let them have some time together, but a few moments later the tree was on fire."

"The exercise was evasion and tracking. I did my part." She replied cooly.

"Gold star for the scout then," Lita muttered agitated before turning back to Serena. "It doesn't matter what you did before, it's just good you guys are back."

Serena stared at Lita for a long time before she asked quietly, "Is that what you all think? That I messed up?"

Confused and concerned expressions told Serena more than words could.

"We just assumed...when you never said...that…" Ami trailed off nervously. Though she had to give her credit, she was the only one who tried to say anything at all.

"I see," Serena replied gathering her few things and starting down the long stairway.

"Were we wrong?" Lita asked standing again.

Serena couldn't speak when she turned back but the tear stained cheeks and pained expression told them what she couldn't. They'd underestimated her and it hurt.


End file.
